Yesterday, Owen and I went to a Carter's store to try and find a cute bringing home outfit. I know that it is probably way early to be looking for this, especially given our bringing him home time is somewhere between 4-6 months, but we went anyways.
And of course everything in the entire store was absolutely adorable. I sort of fell apart. It was so hard to see all of these tiny baby clothes for the size he is now, and then see the still tiny, but so much bigger clothes we will be buying for our son when he comes home.
I was on the verge of tears the entire time I was in the store, and probably was walking around with a pinched, weird expression on my face that scared other mothers. There was a little baby in there who was 3 weeks, not much younger than our son, and I had to walk away quickly before I started bawling. (After I told the mom how beautiful her son was, so she didn't think I was a crazy!)
I may have to stay out of baby stores until it is much closer to bringing him home.
For those of you who have given birth, remember how 10 months seemed like such a long time, and the impatience was almost unbelieveable? That is what waiting after a referral is like, except for me, it is worse. He is here, we see pictures of him, we could fly there and see him, but we couldn't bring him back until we have gone through all of the procedures. Everyday he is growing, and everyday I am missing it.
A long time ago, I remember talking about how when you ask God for patience, he doesn't give you patience, but opporunities to be patient (Evan Almighty). I guess this is my PhD level course on becoming patient!
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